Do I Really Have Anything to Say?

My wife and I often wonder whether we’re doing all the right things with our boys. You know, when they hang their brothers from the ceiling fans by their ankles and use each other’s heads to practice kicking field goals in the back yard. Then, every once in a while, they shock us into such pride in our parenting prowess that we could just burst.

For example, our oldest was playing in his school’s basketball league and one of his teammates got hurt by banging heads with another child. While the refs checked out the player, the coach called for a team conference, but Ryan didn’t get to the huddle. You see, he was too busy kneeling next to the injured boy, rubbing his back, and supporting him. The coach was peeved. I was thrilled that humanity came before tactics.

The next day, our least tame of the wild broncos made a similarly chest-bursting comment. It turns out that he was selected as Star Student for the week, which means that he’s got to make a collage of pictures, bring some things for show and tell, and fill out a paper that answers a few questions about him. This is very standard fare stuff: favorite color, favorite food, coolest toy, etc. Then it asked, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” His answer: a dad.

It’s hard to argue with a kid who answers something so simply as that, who gets to the core of what is the calling and what is the job. If he’s called to be a dad, I can help with that. Rocket scientist? Not so much.

It partially informed a decision I had to make this week, too. I had the opportunity to move up the corporate ladder – two steps, in fact. But I turned it down because the incremental compensation for doing the job was not enough to offset the amount of time I would no longer be able to dedicate to my calling as a husband and father.

When I was growing up, I was always steered toward a career and told that I needed to identify my profession. If I’ve learned nothing else over the years, it has been that there are a precious few who do what they love and can still support their families. The rest of us do what we like well enough to not interfere with our callings as parents.

It turns out that my youngest son is wiser than me. He realizes at the ripe old age of 5 that being a good, supportive, present dad is what really matters.

Tags: corporate ladder, star student